So, the party was...interesting.
From the time she stepped in the door YY acted like nothing was wrong. And honestly, I don't know if I like that or if it just made me even more irked. The jury is still out on that one.
She was all "huggie" and sweet to the point of saccharin.
At one point early in the evening, while Tybalt was munching on Cheerios, she came up to him and said to me, "Don't you just love Cheerios? They are just a lifesaver sometimes. 'Terror' (what I am official re-naming her son, just wait and continue reading) used to love Cheerios." UM, WHAT? OUR LATEST FIGHT WAS OVER ME FEEDING MY SON CHEERIOS BECAUSE THEY ARE MADE OF WHITE FLOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WTH?
But okay, fine, uber Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, but I'll let that one slide. After all, I'm the one that wants things to go smoothly and I thought she was bonkers for not agreeing with Cheerios to begin with.
The following is however where the Pot apparently forgot that she herself is black. She questions and belittles my parenting philosophies and skills all the time. But let me now illustrate hers last night (please note, I know full well in expounding on her parenting and in fact criticizing it, I am sinking to her level, but...yeah, you just gotta hear this, it's too unbelievable to pass up):
As soon as YY and her husband arrived, they headed to the buffet of food and the wet bar, and their 9-year-old son, 'Terror' was left to his own devices. Now, normally this would not be the end of the world with most 9-year-old children. I believe most know how to behave themselves. When I was 9 I did. However, Terror is not most 9-year-old children. First of all, it should be said that it is rumored (YY has told some of us he has it and to others she has denied it) that he has ADD. YY however refuses to medicate because of her disbelief in Western Medicine. Now, coming from an education background, I have worked with lots of children with ADD. When medicated it can be kept under control. When not, well, it depends on the child and the parents. If the parents discipline well, some children have less problems. But when there is both no medication and no discipline--in my experience all hell usually breaks loose. And guess who doesn't believe in discipline? Because after all, discipline "destroys the parental bond." And "we should be our children's friends." So her answer is to blame Terror's behavior problems on processed food and avoid things like WHITE FLOUR CHEERIOS and food preservatives and blindly believe all will be well.
So, anyway, the night started innocently enough with Terror running back and forth between the "children's area" (i.e. a separate tv the hosts had set-up for animated movies and video games) and the buffet. However he grabbed food with no plate or napkin for spills, crumbs, etc. (If I acted like that at 9 at someone else's home, let alone my own, my parents would have never taken me out again.) And literally the ONLY acknowledgement from YY was about an hour into the party when she happened to look up and see him reach into the chip bowl with both hands--"Terror, one hand please. One hand." And when Terror didn't listen? YY sighed and turned back around to her drink and watching the boxing match. (The party was a group of us watching the Pacquiao fight on PPV.)
(P.S. So now Doritos are acceptable food? My head was starting to spin already.)
Many of you might be thinking, "All of that doesn't sound so bad." But keep in mind the following: 1) This woman is so quick to attack others for what they do and don't do. 2) In her attacks she always claims to subscribe to certain PERFECT parenting philosophies.
Anway, Terror progressed from making a mess and not listening to his mother, who honestly didn't even seem to care that much what he was doing anyway, to starting to run around the upstairs level of the house. It was the 'Host's Wife' who politely asked him to stay on the ground floor. His mother, again, either didn't care what her son was up to, or didn't feel it rude for her son to be running around someone else's house without permission. Plus, I'll give you one guess as to whether Terror listened to and obeyed 'Host's Wife' when asked to stay on the first floor? That would be a resounding no.
Finally, at probably about the 3 hour mark (the time is a little sketchy because he wasn't found out immediately) of little to no intervention, or even basic attention, from his mother (or father either--perhaps another post another time?), Terror found a Bic torch lighter, you know the ones with the large handle and long neck, that 'Host" uses to light his cigarettes, and Terror proceeded to run around the house (both floors, still!) with the lighter! A 9-year-old...with a lighter...running around...with other younger school aged children watching in awe and admiration. And he knew how to use it! We found out because he kept lighting candles downstairs (and I don't even want to know what he lit upstairs more than likely) and 'Host's Wife' kept blowing said candles out, wondering how they were being lit and what was going on, until my own husband, Romeo, found Terror with the lighter.
Now, my Romeo is not one to put his nose in other people's business, especially when it comes to parenting (YY's and my spats drive him crazy for both reasons) but when he saw not only a 9-year-old with a lighter, but said 9-year-old's parents nowhere to be found, he immediately stepped in, let's just say "raised" his voice, and told Terror to stop it and put it back where he found it. Luckily, for once in his life, Terror obeyed. (My money is on the "raised" voice. Not only did it probably shock him because his parents never even attempt to discipline, but Terror has known Romeo for a number of years and has probably never heard Romeo's "raised voice" because Romeo hardly if ever uses it at home, let alone in public.)
So, lessons of the night?
Terror will be Terror. YY will be YY (whoever that is, I've yet to figure it out).
And Romeo saved the house from burning down and all of us in it from frying to a crisp.
Bonus--by seeing it with his own two eyes and having to do so, I couldn't shut Romeo up in the car on the way home about what a mess the whole "Y" family is. I think he's finally seen YY for what she is, Terror Y for the problem child he is, and Mr. Y? Well, even I saw a new side of him last night. I think we both did. He was just as aloof and weird as his wife. And that's never been my experience with him before, so more to ponder on. And yes, probably more posts to eventually write! :P
But for now I will take the fact that it looks like I have an ally in Romeo. Not that he didn't take my side before, but he never really wanted to get involved. Now however, he seems to totally VOCALLY agree YY is not only a hypocrite but a little bonkers.