Creative Frustration

When I was a kid, I was obsessed with the thought of finding "my thing". I thought, there has to be something out there that I'm really good at, that would make me so happy that I never wanted for anything else. I took all the lessons: singing, dancing, martial arts, ice skating, etc to infinity. I needed to try everything that sounded interesting, so that I could find It. I never found it. I did, and do many things, but that It still alludes me. Not that I'm trying particularly hard to find it, anymore.

At this point, I have embraced a few things that I honestly do for the sake of enjoyment. My three hobbies. I knit (a lot). I make my bracelets. I blog. I spend as much time as I can doing these things, in addition to the regular, never ending, everyday things that must be done. You know, for life. But, the part of me that was always seeking to be really good at something still isn't satisfied. I look at knitting patterns that are way above my comprehension level, and instead of rationally telling myself that I will get there in a few years, I get frustrated that I can't spend more than two hours knitting to get there faster. I read knitting blogs and get frustrated that I'm not designing patterns the way those knitters are. It's irrational frustration. Relax, enjoy the process of getting there. Of course you're not designing patterns - you're just learning! And ps, you're 29 while most of these knitters are not, so imagine where you'll be when you're a grandmother!

It's the same thing with Beads, comparing my little shop to other shops with thousands of sales. Calm down. Of course you don't have a thousand sales! You don't have the inventory. You've made about 40 bracelets and gotten about 25 sales - that's not bad for the amount you can produce!

Other blogs though, don't. There are so many amazing blogs out there. I read lots of blogs, almost exclusively Moms with young children blogs, who clearly spend lots of time editing and formatting their spaces. They are beautiful and write beautifully and I love reading them. There are so many - I feel like a discover a new site every day. There's BlogHer, and Babble and all sorts of other places for these Moms and writers to do what they do best. And while I envy their abilities, I'm just glad to be very small part of it all. I don't do what they do, and I don't even aspire to do what they do. I'm just glad they're doing it. I like to think of these blogs as BigMommyBlogs, whereas those of us who don't even own our own URLs, we're just along for the ride. (Look for my new favorites linked to throughout this last paragraph, if you're interested in some BigMommyBlogs). 

I Miss My Mommy

I really miss my Mommy. You'd think in your late 20's you'd be able to handle living across the country from your parents. That if you could muster the courage to move away at 22, that by 28 it'd be even easier- that you'd be completely "over" it, used to it, okay with it. That you'd feel like a grown a$$ adult and be okay on your own. But some days and times I just really want my Mom and/or Dad. Some moments I miss them so much I can't function- I just need a good cry. And I get jealous of those, like my husband and some of my friends, who have never lived more than a few hours from their folks and family. I think sometimes they take it for granted. There, I admitted it, I miss my Mommy. And I know, I wrote a month ago about how my Mom lost her job and my parents feel it's possibly the time to relocate out West, and that it makes me nervous because I don't know what I really want...*breath break*...and I still don't. Luckily, perhaps, it's not my decision to make. God/fate will step in and they will go wherever jobs can be found. But it's simply evidence that I really am torn. For every phone conversation that ends with me wanting to poke myself in the eye with a fork, there are moments like today when I am so sad it feels like someone is stabbing my heart with that damn fork.

The first step is admitting you have a problem

Guys, I'm addicted.

Addicted to Emily Maynard's clothes, jewelry, and accessories.

It's embarrassing. But, I'm thinking of cutting myself off from my laptop (whether my work one, or my home one) for the next 10 days in order to detox.

But until then, let me explain myself:

It started with the Bachelorette. Obviously, I like that show a bit too much, as I discovered from the amused/pitying look on Juliet's and our mutual friend D's when I made my best "please watch this show so that I have more people to talk to about it" pitch. I blame the margaritas. (I think I say that phrase a bit too often...)

Emily wears a lot of bracelets. Multiple bracelets, stacked on top of one another. I remember this from when she was on the Bachelor, and that was the first thing I emulated. So, I wanted some pictures of them to see if there were any I could copy. I found this:

Those are simple macrame style bracelets with one single sideways charm. I've perfected the technique using a couple of cheaper sideways charms that I found at a craft store. I think they're pretty, but they're not quite as special. I'm contemplating putting in an order for a few of these special ones, but I'm waiting to get a few more sales before purchasing more materials.

Then, she wore this dress:

And I had to know what it was. It's so beautiful! So, to Google I went. And found this my new best friend, Possessionista. (The dress, while being sold out, is probably also way out of my price range, which at the moment is Ross). Possessionista identifies clothing, jewelry, etc, worn on television. If you're ever wondering whether you can get Rachel Berry's quirky clothes, look to Possessionista for answers. She'll give them to you.

Since so much of what she wears is out of my price range, I've been keeping up with Possessionista to capture the few moments when the pieces are affordable, which, it turns out, is not that rare. Then, came this:

Let's not pay attention to the fact that she's crying, but instead, look at those rings and nail polish!

I had to have the ring. Dana id'ed it as an $860 rose gold ring with diamonds, but also gave us an alternative, $29 from Nordstrom.com. So... after reminding B that he had still owed me a push present (yes, 14 months after our daughter was born), two mouse clicks, and it was on its way. I've been browsing Etsy for a similar small gemstone ring to stack on top of it, but until I find the perfect one, I like it on its own just as much.

At Ross the other day, I was picking up a few non-ratty casual tops and other casual clothes, since, you know, I am going to be around adults not at the workplace, and can't very well wear my t-shirts with random oil stains, spilled milk, and whatever else Mia may have thrown on me. As I was perusing the aisles of discount clothes, each time I picked something out, I found myself thinking: "Would Emily wear this?" Yikes!

I've been keeping Possessionista open in my browser ever since I discovered her. I've come close to making a couple of purchases, but a voice of reason is always in the back of my mind, reminding me that although my paychecks are on time now, I'm still mostly at 4 days a week, and we still have a weekly daycare payment to make. Plus, Emily Maynard and I do not exactly have the same body type.

Then, I was at Target yesterday, picking up some trip essentials, I passed the nail polish aisle and remembered that Dana had also id'ed that nail polish she was wearing as Essie's Fiji. They had it, one bottle left. Right next to it, a very similar color. I tried both with a quick swipe on my nails, and opted for NOT Fiji. I went home, painted my nails and although they turned out nice, they are not the same as the above pictured. I am not sure why I thought that picking the one right next to it would create a superior nail polish look -- What was I thinking questioning the exact match??

B suggested I make a new bracelet: WWEMD. What would Emily Maynard do. Seriously, I have a problem. Phew, I feel better already.

Show me some appreciation. PLEASE!

I started to post the following on Facebook and it got way too long and personal. I must say it's late though and my eyes won't stop closing, so we'll see how long I can hold out. Anyway, it's pretty self explanatory, but if you find yourself with any questions, don't hesitate to leave a comment. Thanks! :)

"Have you ever had such a roller coaster day that ended in a plummet, not a fun uphill climb or wacky twist? And you went for support from a particular loved one but they just zoned out in their own little world? Usually its innocent enough, but I just can't take it tonight! So here's what I hope can happen to get me out of my funk:

Who in Vegas and Henderson loves sushi like I do? Join me! I am gonna waste away if I don't get a fix of 808 Sushi and it's owner Dean soon! Hopefully this weekend. Hoping for happy hour when it's cheaper. Any takers? Frenchie? B? DG? JG? (Or girls night out and boys play with the kids?) But sadly happy hour menu is just rolls and apps, and I know how you four love your Nigiri. (And I like some of it there too actually.) You could also to buy that at regular price or choose AYCE. And I mean I'm not opposed to going for regular AYCE time too. Someone just has to volunteer to call Romeo and convince him to take me out. Extol upon him my superb qualities. That I'm a wonderful wife and the best mother ever and I deserve a night out on the town, at least a night with friends and sushi. Still no luck? Let's all hang this weekend but call it a cheepo lazy ass weekend and not do much of anything but let the kids play and order cheap pizza and drink cocktails, wine, and beer, yes? No? If you can twist my hubby's arm, I can even volunteer the house for the gathering. Do you think you could try to convince my man of that? Whatever you do--penalty of death if you reveal to him that I put you up to this! But what are friends for? In my case I need them to convince my husband how f-ing great I am, all I do, and that I deserve a night of raw fish and friends. (Or at the very least board games, movies, and friends. Are we too old for a retro sleep-over? The kids could sleep in Tybalt's room!) Help me get this off the ground with him! Oh, and now that my ramble's over, really, any local LV or Henderson friends who like sushi are welcome to come and make new friends with us and enjoy good food!"

"I probably need to clarify. I love my husband more than life itself. And most times he is a saint. But sometimes he is a saint to everyone else around us and can get too busy and caught up to remember me. Today was a big scary doctor appointment for me. It ended up going better than anyone could have expected, and I thought when I told him he'd jump for joy. (This is a serious issue with my health that we have been battling together for a couple years.) Instead I got a half-ear listen as he had some action movie on the tv, volume raised to a ridiculous level for early evening.

I now expect some flack regarding venting my frustrations. (Possibly here, but a reminder this was originally a fb post and we have hundreds of mutual friends on there. I have edited the entry there but part is still up. So we shall see.. what kid of crap I have to defend on fb after this. :( ) And I could honestly see why one might berate me--He is the best guy ever--no argument there. So while I concede to take your and their comments warmly and will mull them over and not dismiss, please try to give me an equal chance and respect, keeping in mind that being his wife and son's mother is a different skill set and a whole new ride. When you live with someone 24/7 sometimes you just see things others don't. Some of those are awesome and you feel blessed that only you bear witness to the moments, and some are the nitty gritties that you just need to vent and release so that you can start fresh and anew, which of course is healthy. Romeo is a blessing from God to all in his life. I won't discount your fond stories. 99.9% of the time mine are fond as well, I just ask a favor that you don't attack me for feeling tired and vulnerable and having to admit that I wish there are some things he could work on. He is my everything, but sometimes I wish he'd realize that in these last 2 years we are not just a family of 2--Him and Ty, but rather a family of 3 that includes me. (And in that way, sometimes I have needs and desires that mean he better find a sitter so we can spend time fostering the relationship that is just us.)"

He's Cute and I Love Him...

Please tell me I'm not alone on this one, I love my son.  I would take a bullet for him.  I'd lay down my life for him.  I adore him with all my heart and soul...but some days...I just don't particularly *like* him.

Today is one of those days.  I know he means no harm.  Chances are it's more my PMS and upset stomach than his attitude.  But *everything* is getting on my nerves!  Many days I'd like to just cuddle.  In fact, I wish this usually curious and independent toddler would.  Today, of all days, he refuses to leave my side, won't let me leave the room (which made throwing up earlier today from some eggs gone wrong difficult), won't listen to anything I say or ask, stares at me with big empty eyes like he isn't comprehending when I know he is, and seems to purposely be doing the opposite of what I ask.  Oh, and my darling sleeper usually goes to bed around 11pm, sleeps through the night, wakes groggily for milk around 7 or 8am, and happily falls quickly back asleep for another couple of hours until 9 or 10am. (I should probably quickly explain-- he is put to bed between 9 and 10pm but he chooses to "play" in his crib until later--which is fine with me who has insomnia, his whole sleeping routine and sleepy-head nature is great for me actually--I fall asleep around 4am, drag myself up after a cat nap to give him milk at "first call" and fall back asleep like he does until 10am).  Anyway, today he was up for milk and diaper at 2am, which was no biggie because I hadn't fallen asleep yet, but then up and ready to go go go at 6:30am!  Which means I got slightly over 2 hours of sleep on which to deal with him today.

I'm staring at the clock counting down the minutes until Romeo will walk in the door from work.  Unfortunately, with his job each night is different.  Last night he shocked me by arriving home at 5:55 of his own accord!  Gasp!  Did he really get home before 6pm?  And without my prompting because there was something he or we had to do that night?  With my luck tonight will be a 7 or 7:30pm evening.  Well, when he does get home, Mommy's eating in the bedroom (if eating at all on this still woozy stomach), and Daddy is on full-time duty.  I only feel slightly sorry that Daddy doesn't know this yet.

Anyway, a long, long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, I promised you more pictures of Tybalt, this time with his hair short right after his first cut.  Well, the cut was months ago, I still haven't blogged about it (Oops!  Bad, Juliet, bad!), he actually now needs a new cut, but I do have his cute short hair pictures.  So, in order to keep me sane and remind us all how cute he is, and remind me how much I love him, lol, I thought now would be a decent time to put up some cute pics.  Even though they are 5 months old (from January when he was 17 months old and he's now coming up 22 months): Enjoy!

"Hi, Mommy!  Sure, I'll model for Grandma, but I think you forgot to put my glasses on me this morning!"

"Oh, you were serious about the modeling and smiling thing?  What's the big deal, all I did was get a haircut?  (And scream bloody murder throughout.)"

"What?  Modeling means staying still and smiling nicely?  I thought it meant running and giggling!"

So not interested in getting any good shots for his Grandma and Grandpa in Chicago.

"I'm cute."

"In fact, I'm A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E!"

AAAAAAAAAaaaaaannnnnnddddd, now he's found a cereal bowl and metal spoon to bang.  (Why can't think kid at least choose some quiet tupperware?)  Gotta go put an end to "band rehearsal" as he's now moving on to banging the furniture, the cabinet, and the cable box with said spoon...and now scraping the walls in the hallway.  Sigh....Romeo?  Romeo? Wherefore art thou, Romeo?

Chicago Vacation Part 1: Wedding

Well, we're back! Six days in Chicago, and I need a vacation from my vacation. The first few days were packed full of activities. As soon as our Southwest flight got in, we dropped our bags off at B's grandparents' house and headed over to visit friends for lunch. Mia made a great impression (of course) thanks to her being fully rested from sleeping the whole flight over. She was fast friends with their new dog, so cuteness abounded. That night, we skipped the first of the wedding festivities (cocktails at Greg Achatz's new place) and had dinner with the in-laws. Mia was, again, a perfect angel, eating everything put in front of her, including a little bitty piece of B's favorite Italian Sausage from his favorite Deli.

On Friday morning, I headed downtown to meet up with the Bride's entourage for mani/pedis. This being the most relaxing portion of my trip, I was not disappointed when they took me to the "spa suite" away from the crew for my pedicure. I embarrassingly had to explain to the manicurist that I lived in the desert, and that was why there was so much to scrape off.... Incidentally, I tried a gel manicure for the first time, and as I type this, my nails are still perfect and chip-free. Although I don't have any experience with actually removing the polish quite yet, I am very happy with the results and will not hesitate to get this done again. I've heard they can get very addictive once you start, though. The Bride had reserved a little room for us at the Spa where we were able to have mimosas and a bit of lunch and we had a lovely little time hanging out with everyone.

Just before the rehearsal was to start, my high school group and I (minus the Bride) stopped at one of our old lunch break restaurants to have a cup of coffee and knock out our toast. We had a lovely time coming up with stories, most of which were too embarrassing or inappropriate to include, but you know, that's half the fun. I think we came up with a few gems that would cause the required amount of embarrassment. B was of course in charge of the camera, so there is no picture of our hilarious toast. Pretend to picture 4 girls and a crowd roaring with laughter. Well, I don't know about the roaring part, but we were funny.

But, back to chrological order. The night before the wedding, we attended a very fancy and very big rehearsal dinner at Spiaggia (where Barack and Michelle go on their anniversary, natch). It was more of a pre-wedding dinner since many of the wedding guests were invited, and there was a three course meal and open bar. I was so excited to see that I was seated with the lovely LagLiv and the rest of the Bride's law school friends, on whom I'm sure I made an excellent impression, being half drunk on Prosecco and black truffle arancini. I've always loved the parties that lead up to a wedding because they give you the chance to get to know the wedding guests before the big day, so it's a much nicer sence of community. It was great to meet her, and she is as awesome in person as she is on her blog, so you should all be very jealous. LL and I shared a couple of dances at the wedding itself, and managed to snap a pic together. She is VERY tall and svelte, so I look like an oompa loopma next to her:

Anyway... the morning after the pre-wedding dinner, I woke up (slightly hungover) thinking that the wedding had already happened, but wondering why I could not remember the way the Bride looked in her dress. I quickly realized that I had to get up, take som Advil, eat some carbs and head downtown to start getting ready. The Bride went all out with the pampering, and I got airbrushed foundation, and false lashes, both of which I absolutely loved. Don't judge the results from the above pictures, since this was post ceremony, dinner, drinking, and dancing. Here's a before ceremony, dinner, drinking and dancing shot:

I thought the result was very MadMen Peggy Olson.

The ceremony and reception were beautiful, and held at the Peggy Notebaert Nature Museum, so everything was garden-themed. It didn't rain, but Chicago in May can be pretty unpredictable, so it was freezing for the ceremony. But we sucked it up and stood in the atrium without shawls. But, everything was beautiful and they were married!

Last Night

Have you ever experienced a moment where your reality was, maybe not shattered, but definitely shaken?  Last night was one of those for me.  Romeo, Tybalt and I are fine and safe.  And as far as I can tell by nosing around our apartment complex today in the daylight (I put Tybalt in his stroller to "go get the mail"), everyone else is too.  I can't guarantee that last fact, but I didn't see like any body outline in chalk or anything, so I'm at least 75% sure.  If anyone was hurt they left the premises alive, let's say that.  Don't know who they are or where they are now, but it doesn't appear that anyone was seriously injured.

I guess the reason I'm so shaken is that 1) All of this is new to me--I grew up in the Chicago suburbs, not like an inner-city "bad" area by any means, not the richest part, but middle class suburbs.  And since I've lived in Las Vegas, I've been able to live in almost all good areas.  There was only one "shady" area I lived in a few years ago with a roommate before marriage and family.  But if I didn't feel safe there, I wouldn't have chosen to get an apartment there.  And 2) It's completely unexpected--Because right now, Romeo and I are in the safest of all the places we've been.  We live in what anyone would consider a "good" or "nice" part of town.  Which is just south of what most people consider the "swanky" and "best" part of town.

You're probably going, "Whoa, Juliet, back that up...WHAT?"

I'll leave my middle of the night note typing to speak for itself.  (The following does not have perfect punctuation, which you know I hate doing to you, but it's REAL.)  Here is what I started typing around 1am as I was reflecting on the last few hours, and was *about* to post on facebook as a status, but realized I probably shouldn't.  I did copy and paste it though so I could save it and use it here for your entertainment and enjoyment.  *She nervously laughs.*

So now, "Mommy And The Sin City" Theatre Presents...LAST NIGHT:

"Can't sleep. 10:30'ish pm: I happen to hear two men yelling. Figure it's drunk tenants in the parking lot. A little later hear what sounded like a manual garage door and thought it was weird someone was going into their storage so late at night. 11:41pm: Polite but extremely late knock on our front door. Freak out cuz [Romeo] says he sees cops through peephole. He answers and they are asking if he heard anything because there was a shooting by the apartment pool. (Which is next to our building.) [Romeo] didn't because he was out grocery shopping but I piece what I heard together with what the officer is saying. Officers tape off our entire building/breezeway area from our porch to our rear neighbor's porch which is the other end of the building and next to said pool. 12:15am: Different cop now BANGS on door to wake us up in case we were sleeping. (Yeah, right!) I answer this time and he asks if I heard anything. Then asks who lives with me and if we are all okay, because a shooting happened and bullet went through our rear neighbor's wall! Rear neighbors, as in--we share a wall with these people! 1:09am: Cop car circling complex slowly, using searchlights.

Update: 1:40am: Every little noise, creek, light through window, etc. is creeping me out and scaring me to death. Police tape still up. Have seen so many cops around the property in the last 2 hours I can't count. One is walking breezeway outside front door with flashlight. SUV (unmarked cop car?) is parked at red zone curb right outside my ground level bedroom window. Plain clothes cop (detective?) was heard knocking on upstairs neighbor's door. Saw him walk with neighbor downstairs and neighbor is now gesturing to where he saw/heard things right outside my porch/bedroom window."

And the only things I should add:

A little before 3am I did hear the SUV's doors close--three of them I think, so multiple detectives/cops/officers, and the engine started and it drove off.  By the time Romeo left for work this morning at 7:15am the police tape was gone.  And like I said, at about 3:00pm today I got up the nerve to take Tybalt out and walk around.  No sign of like a murder or victim, so who knows what really happened and if anybody was hurt or if it was gunfire without a victim (I'd like to think so, I guess that would be the best outcome at least), but there were 7-8 police evidence "marks" (they look like post-its with arrows) on my rear neighbor's wall. It would be their living room wall and living room windowsill.  They mark 2-4 bullet holes and the rest are paint chips (where maybe bullets grazed?) !!!  I didn't have time to "snoop" and do exact counts, but you get the gist.

Man, I wonder what happened and if we'll ever really know...

Tell me about yourself award.

Although slightly delayed, here are my seven things for the Tell Me about Yourself Award! Thank you to E at Every day the Wonderful Happens for sharing it with us.
1. As an adult, I have had trouble making friends. In high school, I had a very close, very steady group of four friends. The five of us did everything teenage together, and starting sophomore year of high school, spent basically every weekend and summer together. We were not "cool" in high school, so our teenage things consisted mostly of renting movies from blockbuster, and having sleep overs. I had an awesome time and I love all four of those girls. All four were involved in my wedding in some way or another, and we still make a point of seeing each other every year, despite being scattered across the country. In college, I somehow stumbled on the same thing, but with three girls rather than four. We did everything college related together, pledged a sorority together, and shared an apartment our senior year. One was my maid of honor, and the two others were ushers. In law school, I had friends, but mostly just hung out with B, since, you know, we like, loved each other and all that. Ever since it seems difficult to get to that level of friendship with anyone. My teenage self would have envisioned falling into a "Friends" or "How I Met Your Mother" group, but of course, those are TV shows and might not exist in real life. There are people I like to hang out with, and go out to dinner with, but I've accepted that I am not someone who can make those types of friends, friends that feel like family, now that I'm technically a grown up.

2. Speaking of B, I almost messed everything up when we first started dating. There was a pretty short lag time between when B professed his undying love for me (not really, but you know, he asked if I was his "girlfriend") and when I was dumped by my college boyfriend. After I had gone out with B a few times, my ex-boyfriend decided he had made a huge mistake and wanted to get back together. I almost agreed. But in the end, I declined and told B that yes, I was his girlfriend.

3. If (and when) B and I decide to have another baby, I secretly want another girl. B wants a boy, and of course, that would be so great, in theory. You get one of each, and you're done. But... I love having a girl. She's so cute and pretty and she has the best clothes and toys. When I got pregnant, and before, I wanted boys. All boys. Nothing frilly, no pink, just trucks and polo shirts. Now, if we do make another one (and we will try to, eventually, I talk a big game about just having one), I will secretly hope for a girl.

4. Until I started knitting, I was a real hobby-whore. It started when I was a kid. I took all sorts of classes, from voice lessons, to beading and aikido. My Mom always joked that I was trying to find myself. I just thought that everyone got to be great at one thing, and I was just looking for mine. I'm not awesome at knitting, but I sure do love it.

5. Speaking of knitting, my Mom and I are seriously thinking about opening up a yarn store when my parents retire and choose to come back to the U.S. During my down time, I've promised to look into putting together a preliminary business plan and finding yarn shows to price out wholesale yarn. Most yarn shops that I've been to are pretty stuffy and unwelcoming, plus they're so old fashioned and dark. Knitting is getting really popular with younger people, and I think yarn stores should reflect that. We'll see how things turn out.

6. I am prone to the occasional panic attack. Full blown, I can't breathe panic attacks. In fact, I had one last night, as I was trying to sleep. Halfway asleep, I woke up gasping for air and generally scaring the crap out of my nyquil-ed up husband. Usually, I tell myself that nothing I am currently worried about is real. What is real is the presence of my husband next to me, and my child in the next room, who is currently breathing, fed and happy. Nothing else matters.

7. I'm really grasping here, but my 7th and final thing is that I hate wearing socks. I feel constrained in them. If I have to wear socks, I do, but it feels like my toes can't breathe. The only way I can explain it is that it is some form of claustrophobia. I like living in Las Vegas because the weather rarely dips low enough to require me to wear them. I wear closed toe shoes, like loafters, without socks. This might be the same reason I can't let my nails (of the finger or toe variety) grow, because it feels like the skin beneath the growth cannot breathe!

Although I let Juliet Cap do the dirty work of tagging, I'll add Meredith at Lawyerish since I love her and she likes to do these memes!

Tell Me About Yourself Award

The above is an award currently circulating among bloggers, and it was recently granted to us here at "Mommy and the Sin City" by our "bliend" (blogging friend?  anyone?  no?  well, I tried, lol) "E" at "Every Day The Wonderful Happens."  I recently wrote about her, but if you missed it, she is a blogger who writes about her two pre-school aged sons, pets, faith, husband, and everyday life.  I was led to her blog a couple of months ago while perusing adoption blogs and she is one of the most entertaining, and honest(!), writers I have found when it comes to blogging about their experiences with adoption.  (One son is biological and one is adopted.)

The rules of the award are as follows:

1. Thank the person who gave you this award.

2. List seven things people may not know about you.

3. Pass it on to 15 (or so) other bloggers.

So, I'm actually going to "pass" it next (just in case I lose anyone during my 7 personal tidbits and you don't read until the end).  Frenchie and I put our heads together and wanted to pass this award to those fellow bloggers that we thought would appreciate it most and want most to get in on the fun so we don't have 15 names, but still, we are passing it to: "The Lawyering BeeBeeZfa", Cristy @ "Happily a Law Mama"/"Is There a Doctor in the House?" (She has recently changed blog titles.), and "But I Do Have a Law Degree."

Now, finally, for my personal tidbits:

1. I greatly appreciate Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on Disney Junior.  Admittedly, Donald Duck's and Goofy's voices are like nails on a chalk board to me. And the repetitive songs and sayings, "Everybody say, 'Oh, Toodles!" while I know are exactly the point of the show and what gain the interaction of children in homes everywhere, can be irritating as well.  But man, how it shuts up my kid!  Okay, let me put that in more sensitive terms: Tybalt loves the show and whenever it comes on his attention goes straight to it, so it has saved me and my sanity more than once.

2. I have a secret paralyzing fear of potty training my son.  In all honesty, it was the main reason I was scared when I found out it was boy.  Boys and their "little bits" make me uncomfortable.  I can't explain it, because I know it's natural and nature and all that stuff, but I really think I'm going to squirm and giggle uncomfortably when the time comes to "teach" him.  Plus, who am I to "teach" him, when I know nothing about how a man uses the bathroom?

3. Sometimes, I still cuddle with and talk to stuffed animals like a child does.  Okay, there, I admit it.  I have had the same beloved teddy bear since I was born, a blue and white little guy named Bruno.  And I have others.  Quite a few.  Though those have all gone into Tybalt's room at this point and are considered his.  But Bruno is tucked away in my closet, comes out when I'm having the worst of days and really need him, and will never go to Tybalt.  Sorry, son.

4. I got mad at Romeo the first year we were together when he gave me chocolates for Christmas.  Two years ago when I wanted nothing but Godiva chocolate for Valentine's Day, it really threw him for a loop.  I tried to explain it: a) I didn't like the chocolate when we were "new" to each other and I felt that you got it because you just couldn't think of anything else, and that made me also feel like you looked at your plus-sized girlfriend and thought, "Well, she probably would like something to eat." Now I'm  your wife (and I was pregnant at the time), and I'm okay admitting when I do want some junk food. b) Come on, Godiva is Godiva!  Let's face it, he got me the cheap stuff before.  Lol.

5. Probably as little as 5 or 6 years ago I had never even tried sweet potatoes.  Now, I really like them!  Especially sweet potato fries.  Yum.  Same with sushi--my first experience with that was probably only 3 years ago.  And, well, okay, Frenchie can attest that my kind of sushi is basically maki rolls and only cooked items, but still...I consider that being more open-minded than when I had never even wanted to try a California roll!  And last week I did try [raw] yellowtail nigiri (Hamachi?).  So yes, I say points for me! Whatever you consider it, my tastes have definitely broadened since high school and college, that's for sure.

6. Speaking of food, I have a super power that I have never heard of anyone else having: I can distinctly smell lettuce.  I don't like lettuce.  Yes, I know it's practically tasteless, but it's the texture I don't like, same with cabbage, grape leaves, etc.  Anyway, when I order a burger or taco from a fast food joint, I order them without lettuce.  As soon as the bag is in my car, I can immediately smell if the restaurant screwed up my order and included the lettuce.  It's a sweet, grassy sort of smell.  And I've never heard of anyone else that can smell it, but I definitely can.

7.  My thumbs bend backwards.  I can bend them about 90 degrees back if I press on them, but even naturally, if I just give someone a "thumbs up" or the "hitchhiker's sign," both of my thumbs automatically bend about 45 degrees backwards.  I didn't realize it or know it was strange until I was in junior high or so and a friend at church asked me where someone or something was and I gestured with my thumb.  I remember her doing a double take and crossing the room quickly to ask me to do it again, and showing me it wasn't normal by showing me her thumbs and how they only go straight up.  Then she went up and down the hallway looking for people to show my thumbs to and get an opinion from. I forgot about it for years though, until Romeo got freaked out by it upon his first time seeing.  It still freaks him out to this day.  We've been trying to see if there's any chance Tybalt picked up this strange genetic party trick from me.  Can't tell yet, but sometimes I swear I see his thumbs flex backwards!  :)

Well, there you have it!

Sound Check

Sitting at a sound check and finding myself with time on my hands.  No, sound checks are not my regular gig, but our friends Ron Ellington Shy and Taber Shy, who used to live and perform in Las Vegas (and now live in Southern Cali) wanted to come back and do a show here in town.  So, they know Romeo is not only a music aficionado but as a friend would do anything for them...so, here we are "producing" their show at a park district building on the east side of Vegas.

It means that since October we have been e-mailing, mailing, and calling their old friends and colleagues in town, drumming up support.  Getting chummy with the director at the park district building to work out the details of tonight's show.  Driving to and from Cali and other gigs here in the southwest to take pics of Ron and Taber, just to find that PERFECT one for the ads, fliers, and newspapers.  I've been creating and managing a facebook page for the group and specifically for tonight's concert.  For the last two weeks there's been lots of computer work to create the concert program, slips for audience members to fill out for a giveaway autographed headshot.  I even pulled out my scrapbooking supplies to make a large (and may I say really neat!) "Now Appearing" poster for the lobby.

The show is 7:00pm tonight.  And sound check started at 11:00am this morning.  I love these men.  They are dear friends that I met through Romeo.  He's actually "produced" shows for Ron before when they were both living in Southern California.  But that means I've also been to more gigs of theirs than I can count, and all these songs they are rehearsing right now and will play tonight?  Well, I've kind of got them memorized.  I do have to admit though, that hearing them professionally mic'd is a great experience.  Most times they are playing in blues clubs or casino lounges and none of the sound and tech is tailored to them.  I've heard them this way only a couple of times.

Oh, I forgot to mention, I guess "producing" also includes going to Costco for water bottles, deli meat, cheese, and rolls, and making the band a homemade sandwich tray for backstage.  LOL.  Makes me sort of wonder how Romeo used to produce as a single guy in Cali, seeing while he's been the "business" guy and worked with the contacts for 4 months now, I'm his "right-hand man" when it come to the technology, crafting, and of course sandwich making!  :)

Anyway, it's been an adventure.  But I don't know when we'll be doing it again.  I'm pooped!

Happy New Year (and Whatnot Wednesdays?)

Hello again, and Happy New Year.  Well, if it wasn't obvious before, it's pretty dang obvious now that Frenchie is the more dedicated blogger between the two of us.  But I mean well, I swear!  And like I said recently, my depression is just in full force right now.  And while I hope to feel better soon, I don't quite yet.

I did want to introduce you though to a blog that I've become addicted to as of late: "Every day the wonderful happens.”  The author is a married mom of two pre-school aged boys.  They are 6 months apart—one biological son, and one adopted son.  I encourage you to read more at the blog’s “About” page and then blog post after post, after post, after post!  Believe me, you’ll be hooked!  :)

Once Frenchie returns from her oh so fabulous French holiday, I will discuss with her starting “The Wonderful Happens” trend of “Whatnot Wednesdays.”  I am very excited about the prospect.  Go to the blog and check out some of the author’s Whatnot Wednesday posts to see what I am talking about.

Checking In

Just wanted to say "Hi" and check-in to cyber-land today. Unfortunately I have not been able to post recently. I hosted my first Thanksgiving. And while it went very well (yay me!), something that time consuming and physically intensive takes me a while to recover from. But I will be back up and running soon. Promise!

Happy Holidays! (Merry Christmas!)

No BS Allowed

The following thought has occurred to me numerous times while driving, but I've never actually captured it "on paper." Why must schools make bumper stickers for "Student of the Month," "Gifted Student," etc? I dread the day when Tybalt comes home, excited that he has been granted whatever special title earns him a bumper sticker. I will praise his talent, his grades, his behavior, etc, but I WILL NOT put the bumper sticker on my car. For my car is a Bumper Sticker Free Zone. (Get it? No BS Allowed? :) Haha, okay maybe I'm the only one who thought it was funny, but still...)

When will elementary schools and junior highs learn that bumper stickers might seem like a neat "trophy" to the student, but are a bummer for the parents?

Why can't they give out window clings instead? Something I can put up easily, and here's the key, take down just as easily. I understand they are probably more expensive to order and have printed than the mass bumper stickers, but take note, schools of Las Vegas-- I pledge today to PAY the extra cash if I can just have a window cling instead. Promise. Hell, I'll run the PTA committee that orders them. You won't have to lift a finger. After all, I HIGHLY DOUBT I'm the only parent who is tormented by the arguments from their child when said child wants Mommy and Daddy to be proud of their accomplishment, yet Mommy and Daddy REALLY don't want to put something sticky and permanent on their car. Yep, I don't think it will be hard to head that committee and raise the extra funds at all, for I believe I will have plenty of parents on my side.

Proud parents who ALSO love their cars unite!

To Be Continued

Tonight is the party. It's been confirmed that YY will be there. Wish me luck. I'll let you know how it goes!

NaBloPoMo Luck!

Mommy and the Sin City won BlogHer's Wednesday NaBloPoMo drawing!

Definitely sign up for the BlogHer contests, because they're real!

What To Do?

Two posts from Juliet in one day? What???? Yeah, I know. But there's stuff on my mind.

In this case, the "stuff" is what to do about that toxic friend/non-friend I wrote about recently. See, I took Frenchie's advice and feel passive aggressive is my best option right now at least for keeping my sanity and for making as few tidal waves in the friend circle we both run in as possible.

However, passive aggressive can work well like on facebook, but I am going to a party this Saturday night that "YY", let's call her that because I failed to give her a name before, will more than likely be at. After all, it's hosted by Tybalt's Godparents, who are friends with both of us.

Assuming she's there, what do I do? I've seen her before, obviously, while times have been tough between us, but I've been in a better state emotionally. And with my fragile (read: depressed) mental state right now about everything else, I just don't feel like I have the same "grin and bear it" resolve that I have been able to muster up before.

I WILL NOT start a "thing" (a fight, an issue, a scene, whatever you want to call it). I'm not that kind of person. I not only have far too much respect for those around me, but what I hope I also got across in my last post about YY is that I'm not the one that's ever started any of the stuff between the two of us! However, if she is snippy to me, I am more afraid of the fact that I might lose it and either cry and/or have a panic attack where I start sweating and shaking and hyperventilating. Her online and text comments and rants have caused me in the past to do both. And I definitely cannot do either Saturday night. I cannot break down in front of everyone and cause a scene.

So, what to do? How to handle the situation? I need moral support.

Meeting Bloggers: What would you do?

This weekend, Swistle posted about the possibility of running into a blogger in real life. Lately, this notion has taken an active place in my every day musings. It's nothing dramatic - just a funny situation in which I will soon find myself. If anyone is out there, I really would like some feedback on what YOU would actually do if you were in the position of meeting someone you *think* you already know well, you know, virtually. Keep in mind that I do not share this blog with my immediate friends or family. This is an entirely anonymous-from-real-life forum for me. I may not do too much to hide my identity, but I do not advertise to people I know that I write here. This may change in the future, but for now, this is my decision.

I started to regularly read blogs right around the time I got married and toyed with the possibility of becoming pregnant. I wanted insight on being a Mom, and I started reading all sorts of Mommy bloggers. Law Moms, Stay at Home Moms, Work at Home Moms. Before I started regularly following my favorites (all of whom are in my bloglist), there was one blog that I had tuned into now and then for several years. I won't say who, but one of these bloggers is a real-life friend of a very good friend of mine, who I went to high school with. I had visited her blog ages ago becase my high school friend had talked about her a few times, and I was curious.

This blogger is popular - not Swistle or Amalah popular - but certainly popular, so I doubt she's read Mommy and the Sin City. I'm not trying to be self-deprecating or anything, we haven't been around that long, I'm fine with it. As Swistle said, it's impossible to say whether you like someone based on their blog. You like (or don't like) the things they write about, their manner of writing, etc. I'm often a pretty fickle person, and I am even more so in the case of bloggers. To be completely honest, I am not sure she and I would be great friends if I knew her in real life. We probably have very different senses of humor, different attitudes and personalities. But I do like her blog, and enjoy most of her posts and insights. I think this has to do with the fact that I've been following her blog longer than others, and feel like I actually "know" this person, and often re-tell her stories, even going so far as referring to her as "a friend". (Gah! Embarassing!) In the end though, I do like this blogger a lot.

Onto my actual point. This blogger and I will be attending the same event, an overnight and small event, because of our common friend. Our common friend, by the way, knows that I've read the blog, but does not know that I write one myself. I'm not having any kind of "OMG I'M GOING TO MEET HER SQUEEE" feelings, I'm just mostly not sure how I am supposed to act. I do feel mildly embarassed to know so much about this person when this person doesn't know me (I assume). I suppose this is something you become accustomed to, if you are a popular blogger. Do I pull her aside and tell her that I've read her blog? Do I not mention it, and if she says something to me that I already know, tell her then? Do I just pretend that I don't know her at all? For now, I'm inclined to do the latter. What do YOU think? I honestly want an answer here.

Wine Novice

I would like to open this blog post to anyone and everyone who can be of help and offer their suggestions. I would like to know more about wine. Specifically what wines I might like best. I can tell you this--as of now my favorite wine costs about 4 bucks and can be purchased at the local grocery store.

I want to be a wine connoisseur. I wish I knew all about wines, or at the very least what all the common wines are (merlot, white zinfandel, etc.). But unfortunately, I've never learned much. Partly because the few pricey ones I've tried I just don't care for. And if you are repeatedly disappointed by something, where is the motivation to keep trying? But in all honesty I'd love to learn more and thus learn what my favorite wine or two really are. To be able to go into a restaurant, see the wine list, and pick out exactly what I want. To not be disappointed when I order based simply on the brief description, and then turn out not liking it.

What I can tell you is I like fruit, citrus, berries. I don't like licorice or wood. Okay, I actually don't know if I like wood or not, so I'd be up for experimenting in that department. But definitely no on the licorice flavor.

For right now, embarrassingly enough, my two favorite "wines" (I use that term loosely) are both Wild Vines brand: Strawberry White Zinfandel, and Blackberry Merlot. I believe I probably like these because they are so highly flavored--I've never been one who likes a strong alcohol flavor. And I do find most REAL fine wines taste strongly of alcohol, so, I guess if I want to like wine more, I might have to bite that bullet, but still...

Oh, I am also a fan of Sangria. Again, I'm betting that's because of all the fruit infused into the flavor.

But anyway, I am wondering if anyone has any suggestions as to what wines I might be interested in trying. Feel free to comment and ask me more questions about my tastes. All help and suggestions appreciated!

P.S. I just heard of a winery via the Food Network called Cupcake Vineyards, and they make a wine based on my all time favorite dessert--Red Velvet! It's description is: “Our first blended red wine for Cupcake Vineyards has over the top aromas of chocolate, deep rich blackberries, red fruits that follow through the palate to a creamy mocha finish that is unmistakable in its intensity and length, with a hint of coconut. It’s reminiscent of a blackberry chocolate cupcake with a mocha coulis.”

Um, can you say yum? :) Maybe that will be my first venture outside the "2 Buck Chuck" as my husband calls my cheap-o wine selections.

Mom Jeans

There have been a few changes over here at Mommy and the Sin City. First, I finally (after a few comments about having trouble reading the blog title and heading) changed our template and background. I liked the crazy bird drawings from before, but I like making simple, aesthetic changes once in a while. Not sure how long this one will be here, I'm already having some second thoughts. Too much pink, maybe?

I've become a member of BlogHer, and added us to their blog directory. I signed our blog up for NaBloPoMo, since apparently November is National Blog Posting Month. The rules are simple, you have to post every day for a month. I figure, since we've been doing so well already, might as well give us some extra momentum. Sorry Juliet, I probably should have consulted with you first! No worries though, I think we can do it. If you're interested in joining NaBloPoMo, click on the icon to the left and it will bring you over there. (You've got until tomorrow to sign up if you want to be on "the list") If you get stuck without any inspiration, they've got daily suggestions that you can follow. Apparently, there are also prizes!

Now that those announcements are done... onto Blog content.

My dedication to the South Beach Diet has waned, significantly. Although I still want to lose weight (Jillian Michaels, 3 times a week, yoga on the alternate days!) the whole no-sugar thing stopped working about 3 weeks into the whole thing. I don't have much direction on the weight-loss road anymore, but I am trying to consciously make good choices (Today: greek yogurt for breakfast, turkey sandwich on whole grain bread for lunch, turkey burger on a whole grain bun with a side salad for dinner - turkey twice was not intentional, but not bad). I'm still losing weight, but not quite at the SBD pace that I set for myself in weeks 1 and 2.

Unfortunately (and realistically), this means that I have not hit my goal of fitting back into my regular sized jeans before the colder weather hit Las Vegas. I put them on in week 3 and found that I was still inches away from buttoning them. Last week, there were a few days when I looked totally ridiculous coming into work in capri pants, when the rest of the office has already busted out their jackets and full length slacks. So, off to the Gap I went, trying on every single pair of jeans they had in their store, one size up from my regular size. It was one of those times when I didn't want to just to pick a pair, but wanted to hold out for a flattering pair that would make me feel confident, that I would actually wear. A pair that didn't look like the dreaded MOM JEANS.

I realized that I would have to stay away from my staple low/mid rise jeans. Now, I need the extra support to hold up the post-baby wiggly belly. If I put any kind of waist band across my pooch, it muffin tops like crazy. Even a jersey skirt with a loose waist looks dumb if it cuts me off at the wrong place. It turns out, there isn't a section of the store that sells "Mom jeans" that you are supposed to avoid. Every pair of jeans I put on, whether they looked totally trendy on the mannequin or not, were in fact... Mom Jeans. It's not so much the jeans that make them Mom jeans, but the one who is wearing them. I hoped for something trendier, something that I could tuck into my boots when I got colder, but I couldn't find the perfect combination of mid/high rise and slim leg. Instead, I settled for these:

Photo curtesy of Gap.com

They may not look like Mom Jeans on that model, but I promise you that they are. Hopefully this whole Mom Jean phenomenon is only temporary, and my belly does shrink back a little bit. But for now, I look nice. And nice is better than I would look if I tried to squeeze into my old, decidedly non-Mom jeans.

Quick Note

I wanted to quickly point out how much more creative Juliet Cap is than I am, since I call my husband "B" and she calls hers Romeo. I briefly considered changing my nickname for him to "Italian Stallion" after I saw Juliet's post, but couldn't stop laughing for long enough to actually do it. So that creativity is exactly why I said she was a better writer!

Also, I added an "about me" page which has an expanded bio, so take a look over there, too!